Authenticity Killers: He Said, She Said

People are messy. If I’m honest, sometimes that bothers me. People who can be squeezed into boxes are easy to understand. But every year that goes by reminds me more & more that those neatly packaged kind of people don’t exist. They may look that way at first glance — but there are always a million stories, unanswered questions, and pieces to their hearts that a glance couldn’t give away. Yes, people are messy. And living authentically always brings that mess into the open.

Living with authenticity means stepping out of those boxes, knowing that we are more than a stereotype, a career, a denomination, a personality profile. We’re complex, and God saw this, & He said it was good. So should we. Life in the open illuminates the beautiful & the broken, all at once. Doing life like this, diving headfirst into honesty about who we are, is freeing. Other people will follow suit. And when we all jump in together, messes will collide sometimes.

If there’s one thing I can assure you of, it’s this: living an honest life will bring conflict. When we choose to step out of hiding & call others to do the same, we won’t always see eye to eye. This is not always bad. It’s an opportunity to grow in grace, to celebrate differences, to gain understanding into a heart that has some messy places. Just like yours.

As you come across conflicts, big & small, remember this: the soul you disagree with is uniquely crafted & divinely cherished by the same God who fashioned yours. Conflict is an opportunity to run toward one another in grace, not run from one another to gossip. When tensions rise up — & they will — choose to go directly to the source & work through them. Spreading negativity & frustration will never help, therapeutic as it may feel in the moment. Seek resolution for the conflict & restoration for the relationship.

Sometimes we fear that honesty will ruin the bond we share, but hiding the truth breaks more ties than genuine conversation ever could. Honesty is the solution that cleans debris from the wounds, love is the salve that soothes them. So speak the truth, but steep it in love first.

So today? I’ll be honest. I’ll be loving. If conflict stirs, I’ll run to pour grace over it — grace that leaves no room for gossip to seep in & pollute relationships I love so dearly. My internet friends, carry honesty & love with you today, too. And every day. Your people will thank you for it.

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